How to Make an Impression at Your Next Informal Professional Event

Champagne in glasses in restaurantFew people succeed in their IT careers based solely on their technical skills. Professional soft skills often play an even bigger role. And sometimes, your basic social skills will spell the difference between seeming like the right woman or man for the job, or resonating as just another “computer guy.”

Consider the following story

My colleague and I were on-site with a big international client, and it was the day before a major holiday. Everyone in their organization was participating. That meant our work went on hold, replaced by a succession of social gatherings that consisted of toasts, toasts, and more toasts. Not the most productive day, but part of the job.

Yet during all this, my colleague ran into a potential pitfall even larger than the risk of boredom. I’ll let her take it from here:

“Towards the end of the day we met with our clients at yet another company meal. The CIO was there, along with 10-12 of his direct reports, and a handful of other VIPs. Everyone’s joking and laughing, more toasts are being given, and while I’m feeling a little anxious because I’m here to get work done rather than celebrate, there’s a bigger concern on my mind—I don’t understand the language everyone’s speaking.

Usually this language barrier isn’t a problem; either we conduct our meetings in English or there’s someone translating for me. But not at this event. I’m sitting through all these speeches without a clue what’s being said… and then, all of a sudden, right after a team meber has just stood up and read a very long poem they wrote in their native tongue, one of the CIO’s direct reports turns and says to me, in English: ‘You’re our guest here—you make the next toast!”

Remember: Not only do I have no idea about the content of everyone else’s toasts, I also have no clue what tone I should use. Somber? Funny? Family-oriented? So I take a safe, all-purpose route, and give a toast I always have on hand: ‘May we be this happy and together again at this time next year.’”

Let me tell you—our clients loved her toast. And it dawned on me that it would actually be an appropriate toast in just about any situation.

These Things Add Up

Now, would my colleague have 86’d her career if she hadn’t given such a great toast? Of course not. But the cumulative effect of succeeding in these countless small social moments cannot be overstated. It builds the bond between people and creates some humanity around the hard work you do together.

Granted not every IT professional finds themselves having to give a proper toast too often. But everyone finds themselves in informal professional events where they must succeed socially. And just as you’d never go to a formal meeting unprepared, it’s a good idea to always be ready when you attend an informal event with your colleagues and stakeholders. Whether that means memorizing the above toast verbatim, or simply having three appropriate small-talk questions on hand that you can ask anyone you are sitting with at the next company dinner, developing tactics for handling these situations can go a long way towards proving you’re more than just the “computer guy.”

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